


HUMANITY

by JanewayorNoWay



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-12
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2019-08-01 04:47:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,288
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16278098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JanewayorNoWay/pseuds/JanewayorNoWay
Summary: Shortly after returning to the Alpha Quadrant, Kathyrn Janeway and Seven of Nine had a falling out. Two years later, something is very wrong with Seven and Janeway is still bitter about the way they parted.The E rating comes later. It's just G right now.I just cleaned some stuff up. Logic things that were bugging me.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please, please comment. Let me know what you think. I've been working on this for months and this is all I have. I have no idea where this story is going to end up.

 

**HUMANITY**

The Admiral could hear her yelling long before she could see her.  “This force field cannot hold me!” She heard her say, “I will instruct my nanoprobes to disable it!” The officer behind the desk gave Janeway a rueful grin. “Good evening, Admiral.”

 “Hello, Carl. What did she do this time?”

 “Bar brawl. Threatened to assimilate someone. Everyone freaked out.”

 “Was anyone hurt?”

 “Only the Borg.”

 “She’s not Borg!” snapped the Admiral.

 “Sorry, Admiral, I forgot. Anyway, she cut her hand. She’s been tended to.”

 “Okay. Can you release her to me?”

 “Um… this is the last time I can do that, Admiral. Sorry. They’re not particularly pleased upstairs that she doesn’t seem to learn her lesson.  So, next time, charges will be filed, she’ll have to face the court. You’ve done enough, honestly, ma’am.” Janeway dropped her head into her hand, rubbing at the tension above her eyes. “Understood.”

 When Seven came around the corner and saw Janeway, her face lit up, “Admiral! Tell these people who I am,” she slurred.

 “I think they know, Seven.”

 Kathryn Janeway wanted to be furious with the ex-Borg. This was the third time in 8 months she’d been called to the station to retrieve a drunk Seven.  The first time she’d gotten a frantic phone call from Chakotay. She was a little resentful that neither he nor Seven had reached out to her at all in the 2 years since they’d returned to the Alpha Quadrant. _“Oh, now you need my help?”_ She thought. “ _After you took Seven from me?”_

The first time, Janeway had easily negotiated Seven’s release and gotten the charges dropped, tyhen, transported her back to NJew Mexico to be with Chakotay. She was a little annoyed about her life being interrupted and having her favors used up for the Borg, who had, cut off contact with her shortly after their arrival in the Alpha Quadrant.

Three months after that, she’d gotten another desperate call. Same routine. That time, she didn’t have the patience to listen to Seven complain about Chakotay. “You shouldn’t have married him then. I tried to tell you that and you wouldn’t listen.”

Now, as Janeway escorted her to the transporter station, she felt this overwhelming need to cry. She was so angry with Seven but, watching her come apart at the seams for the last few months had been terrifying and heartbreaking. Especially since she’d taken to drinking. “You need to stop drinking, Seven.”

“Alcohol impairs my functioning.”

“Yes.”

“I am saying that is why I drink. I wish to impair my functioning.”

“Oh, god, Seven.” Janeway stopped in her tracks, her chest rising and falling as she tried to pull the tears back in. “Let’s get you home to your husband,” she finally said and started walking toward the transporter again. Seven remained behind.  “Seven?”

She was standing, looking pained and lost. “I do not wish to go home.”

Janeway sighed, “You can’t stay with me, Seven.”

“Only for tonight, Captain… Admiral. I will return in the morning.” 

***********

When they entered Kathryn’s condo overlooking the bay, Seven of Nine was surprised to find a woman waiting up for them. She was quite beautiful, Seven noted. She was a little taller than the captain, lithe and muscular, with short dark, wavy hair, deep black eyes. She crossed to them and embraced the Captain, kissing her quickly on the lips. “What have we got here, Katie?”

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, but, I just didn’t feel it was safe to send her home until she’d sobered up.” 

“Who is this?” Seven inquired.

“This is my significant other, Cara Ingram. We’ve been seeing each other for over a year now.”

“Does she live here?”

“Seven,” Kathryn slipped into her command voice, “You’re being rude.”

Seven closed her mouth, deciding another inquiry into who this woman was and what she was doing here was apparently something she was not allowed to ask about. Cara gently took Seven’s arm, “Let’s get you situated in the guest room, shall we?” As she led the young woman off, Seven turned back to look at her Captain, confused, then turned back to Cara, “You are Betazoid.”

“Half. But, still empathic, if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Yes. Can you tell what I am feeling?”

“Grief, anger, a sense of betrayal… but many people have these feelings. And the reasons are all different.”

“Yes.”

 ************

Cara was already in bed by the time Kathryn had finished the work she’d had to set aside when she went to get Seven.  The redhead collapsed into bed.

“You can’t keep doing this, Katie.”

“I know, Cara.”

“You don’t owe her anything. She made that clear two years ago when she basically told you to fuck off.”

“I am not going to discuss this now.”

“When will we discuss it? As long as we’ve been together, she’s been the third person in our relationship.”

“This is the last time. I promise. Believe me, it’s not fun for me either.”

Cara’s jaw tensed. “She’s a very troubled young woman, Kate. It comes off her in waves. Something has happened to her, some trauma –”

“She was assimilated by the Borg…”

“No. Something in the last year.”

“I figured that out from the three trips to the police station in the last eight months.”

“You’re not her mother. You’re not her lover. She needs professional help. You owe her nothing.”

Kathryn turned on her side to face her beautiful dark-haired lover.  She reached out and stroked her hair away from her forehead, “Let’s not fight over this.”

Cara cupped Janeway’s jaw, “I agree,” She leaned in and kissed the red head. “God, I want you all the time.”

Janeway grinned, “No one’s stopping you.”

In the guest room, Seven’s exceptional hearing picked up on the activity in the next room. She felt a stab of loneliness, listening to the sounds of her Captain making love to another woman. She was overwhelmed by the sensations that flooded her. Want, desire, hurt, loss, hopelessness. Seven did not understand why she would feel these things. And she had no way of understanding them, because she did not have the Captain to guide her anymore. That was Seven’s doing. She had been the one to sever the relationship.

 

** TWO MONTHS LATER **

 Kathryn arrived home from work to an upset Cara, holding the comm out for Janeway as she walked in the door.

“What?” She snapped. She hated when Cara got that fed up look.

“It’s about that woman again.”

Kathryn groaned and took the comm. “Yes, Seven?”

“This is Sekaya. I am calling you even though my brother and Seven would be furious if they knew. But, you need to come get Seven.”

Janeway had had enough. She’d done her penance for whatever sin had made Seven remove herself from her life so abruptly. “Why me, of all people, Sekaya? I want no part of whatever drama is going on with them. They made they’re bed.”

She could hear Sekaya breathing, trying to control her anger, “Chakotay is gone, Kathryn. He left a month ago. No one knows where he is. And Seven…” her voice broke, “She’s going to die if someone she trusts doesn’t help her.”

“I didn’t realize it was that bad.” Kathryn felt the weight of a familiar ache. The one that always sent her after Seven. That sick feeling in her gut.

“Didn’t realize? You bailed Seven out of jail three times in the last 8 months. What didn’t you realize? That she drinks too much? That she’s nothing but skin and bones? That her behavior is completely erratic? Because, here is the strange part, Kathryn. I only met Seven two years ago, and even I knew she was in trouble. You’re her closest friend! And you just kept shipping her back here!”

“She ended that! She made it clear that I was not welcome in her life. She is not my responsibility, Sekaya.” There was a long silence. Then, Sekaya spoke, I had hoped Seven’s friends would be there for her.” Another pause, “In 3 days, I am committing Seven to a Psychiatric Hospital. The paperwork has been submitted, I’m simply waiting for the okay.”

Then, the line was dead. Sekaya had simply hung up and walked away.

 

** NEW MEXICO – 3 DAYS LATER **

Sekaya stood looking out her window, twenty meters away, a drunken Seven of Nine was beating an old alcove with a spanner. “How can you not have a nine-pin connector?!” Sekaya stepped out onto the dirt and clay patio, “Seven… there’s someone here to see you.”

Seven twirled around, stumbling. “No visitors.”

“They’ve come a long way, Seven, it would be rude to dismiss them.” Seven immediately became docile and nodded. Sekaya had learned, over these last few months that, if she needed Seven to do something, she merely had to ‘remind’ the ex-borg about social niceties. This seemed to be an old, respectful, habit she’d developed under the Captain’s tutelage. Sekaya had used it to subdue the erratic, drunken, Borg many times. Yes, Captain Janeway had deeply impressed the necessity of manners on the young woman, and Sekaya was grateful for that, but her heart was breaking. She saw a little girl who had been abandoned again by her maternal figure, and she had watched, over the last year, as that abandonment had slowly destroyed her.

“I will see to my visitor,” Seven said and turned to start in the house. Sekaya quickly glanced into her window and signaled a waiting party there. As Seven entered the home, she was quickly grabbed by two local security police.

“No! What are you doing? Release me! I will assimilate you!”

Sekaya stepped inside and shook her head at the two concerned officers, “She doesn’t have enough nanoprobes anymore.”

Seven broke free and ran out the back door. Just as she reached the shuttle, a third security officer tackled her and deftly injected her with a hypospray. Seven spun to confront Sekaya. “No! Sekaya! No!”  The terror and betrayal on Seven’s face crushed Sekaya.  She cursed her brother, “You did not do right by your wife, Chakotay.” In seconds, Seven was out cold.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?!” A furious voice bellowed out. “Get away from her!” Admiral Janeway rushed the guard, pushing him out of the way. She  kneeled to examine Seven.

“Her pulse is barely there. What did you inject her with?”

“It’s just a sedative, Admiral,” Sekaya said, “I knew we’d never get her to go voluntarily.”

Janeway swiveled to the source of the voice, “Where is your brother, Sekaya?”

Sekaya shrugged, “Who knows? He came home with his own demons.”

Janeway turned to the security officers, “Carry her to my shuttle.”

“Yes Ma’am,” the three officers replied in unison.  They immediately began following her request. Janeway and Sekaya grinned, her command voice was still in full force.

Janeway looked at the ground. It was beige. She looked out to the horizon. Everything as far as the eye could see was beige. She didn’t understand the appeal of this desolate place. “I should have come sooner.”

“You should never have let her come here.”

“If I’d known she’d be treated so badly, I wouldn’t have.” She saw Sekaya set her jaw, “She was not mistreated, Admiral. She was adored. By Chakotay, by me, my family. She is a special soul, it is hard not to love her. But she is the most lost soul I’ve ever known. And like many lost souls in our community, she discovered that Palanqua could numb the pain.” Palanqua. Janeway had imbibed a few shots in her lifetime. It was made from the local cactus and wild jumsin, an herb similar to sage. It  tasted like turkey stuffing and diesel fuel and it knocked you on your ass. Janeway kicked at the beige earth, “Is there anything else I need to know about what’s going on with Seven?”

Sekaya started to say something, then stopped, “I think it is best if Seven tells you herself.”  As Janeway strode back to her shuttle, Sekaya called after her, “Be careful, her detox is going to be brutal.”

*********** 

Gretchen Janeway was sitting on her porch, drinking her nightly two fingers of warm whiskey and honey when her daughter arrived. The shuttle set down across the road in an open field. She couldn’t imagine why she was visiting. The last time Kathryn had been there, the three of them had gotten into a fight over her oldest daughter’s refusal to take better care of herself.  It had been clear to Gretchen and Phoebe that Kathryn was not well. The woman who had stepped off Voyager at Utopia Planetia was not the woman they had known.

Gretchen watched as her red-haired first child put her arm around what looked like a half-conscious Seven of Nine. She raised her brow. That was interesting. One of the things they had fought over was her refusal to discuss the woman she had enthusiastically communicated about in all her messages home during the last three years of her journey. It had been clear that Kathryn was in love with the vibrant young woman.

Seven had been the first person they’d inquired about that day on Utopia Planetia. She’d seen a shadow cross her daughter’s face, then the command mask slipped down, “Huh? Oh, Seven, she’s with her fiance, Chakotay.” Gretchen and Phoebe knew not to inquire further.  Until 3 months ago, when Kathryn had been called for the third time by the San Francisco police department. Gretchen couldn’t sit in silence any longer. “Kathryn, what is going on with Seven of Nine?”

“How should I know? She married a man she didn’t love. It’s not my problem.”

Gretchen should have known better than to bring it up with Phoebe in the room. Phoebe exploded, “When is it your problem?!” Normally, Gretchen would have intervened, quieted Phoebe, but she felt Kathryn needed to hear this. “I don’t understand you. What happened to you out there? Was I crazy? Were you never in love with Seven?”

The Captain whirled on her sister, “I was! I was madly in love with her, but I could never act on it while we were lost in the Delta Quadrant. So, she chose someone else!”

“Is that why you’re so angry with her?”

“It’s the way she did it!”

** STARFLEET HEADQUARTERS - 2 YEARS EARLIER **

It had been after a particularly grueling debriefing session about the young ex-borg. Janeway had been in meetings for weeks about Seven of Nine, and she’d fought tooth and nail to make them see her as human and not a threat to the entire galaxy. She had asked that Seven not be present for these debriefings because they were so unsettling. The scientists interested in Seven spoke of her as if she were a machine, a dead thing. And they wanted to deactivate her and pull her apart piece by piece to “study.” The Captain had almost come to blows with the head of the team that wished to tear her apart.

At the end of the last debriefing, she had exited the conference room, completely wiped out only to find Seven of Nine waiting for her.

“Seven!” The Captain smiled at her.

“Captain, I have been concerned for you. I wished to see how you are faring.”

“You’re safe, Seven. “

Seven nodded, “I appreciate all you are doing for me, Captain. I feel distressed that so much of your time since we got back to Earth has been spent defending me.”

“You’ll be safer if you accept a commission. I put in papers for a commission at Lieutenant Junior Grade. Starfleet takes a dismal view of dissecting Starfleet Officers. Admiral Paris has assured me your commission will be approved.”

“That is… most unexpected, Captain. But I do not believe I will be taking a commission.”

“Oh. Well, I’ve also had inquiries from The Theoretical Propulsion Group. The Daystrom Institute. There are many opportunities for you.” 

“You have done a great deal to secure my future, Captain and it is appreciated. However, I am not ready to make a decision yet.”

“Understood, Seven. Take your time. Meanwhile, why don’t you come spend the weekend with me in Bloomington? I always promised you I’d take you there.” 

“You have not heard?” 

“Heard what?” 

“I am marrying Chakotay this weekend. I have come to invite you.”

Janeway stumbled back a step. She’d been shot through the heart. She thought Chakotay was out of the picture. He’d taken off as soon as they’d hit Utopia Planetia. 

“Chakotay? He left you two days after we arrived.”

Seven teared up at the memory. “Yes. He arrived back last week and begged my forgiveness. I have granted it.” 

“He abandoned you, Seven. He knew you were afraid and alone in a quadrant you knew nothing about, he knew that Starfleet had every intention of deactivating you, experimenting on you, and he left, without a word. Like a coward. That’s not love, Seven.”

“I believe he will be a good mate. He has taken care of me since he’s been back and I feel grateful for all he has done.”

 _HE’S BEEN HELPING YOU?  HIM?!_  Janeway silently screamed. Had Seven not noticed the 16 hour debriefings about the ex-Borg and how Janeway almost got stripped of her command because she fought so fiercely to protect the woman? It was Janeway who had prevented Starfleet from seizing her and dissecting her piece by piece. Not that idiot, Chakotay. 

None of this showed, her command mask firmly in place. 

Seven’s face twisted into anguish. “I have disappointed you with my decision.”

“No. It’s not that, Seven, it’s just, I had hoped you and I would be able to spend some time together once I was away from these grueling debriefings.”

“We will spend much time together Captain, I will only be in New Mexico, with Chakotay and his family. And, we will start a family of our own. Soon.“

“Seven, what are you doing? You’ve only been with Chakotay for 6 months, you’ve seen how unreliable he is. He abandoned you, Seven. It’s been, what, ten weeks? He knew your life was at stake and he opted to take care of himself first.”

When she saw the Borg ice water run through Seven, hardening her features, she knew she’d gone too far. “You are no longer my Captain, Kathryn. You do not get to guide me, nor make judgments about my decisions anymore, I am a free being. That is what Chakotay told me. He said you would try to control me, as you did on Voyager. I am no longer your subordinate, or your project. I have my own mind and I make my own decisions.”

“Control you? Seven, I never wanted to control you. It’s just the nature of working on a ship. There’s a …

“Command structure, yes. And now, there is not. I had hoped you would be happy for me, but Chakotay warned me you would not. He told me of your early attraction to him on New Earth. He said you used his attraction to you to emotionally manipulate him. This rang true to me, in my own experiences with you. You want what you want, Captain, and the words that come out of your mouth only serve that purpose. We are on Earth now, not a starship, and you no longer have control over my choices.”

And with that, Seven of Nine turned and left. Janeway stood in the corridor, heartbroken and furious

 

** BLOOMINGTON - PRESENT **

As her daughter approached, Gretchen crossed to her and took Seven’s other arm. They dragged her feet through the red Bloomington dirt, up the porch and into the house. When they finally got her upstairs and flopped onto the guest bed, Kathryn waited for her mother to say something. That she had been right, that Seven was in trouble and she was angry with her daughter for allowing it to get so bad.

“I’ll make a fresh pot of coffee,” she said and quietly slipped out of the room. Kathryn slumped into a chair, still breathing hard from dragging an implant laden Seven up a flight of stairs. She couldn’t look at the young woman, guilt creeping in on her. How had she been able to let Seven deteriorate this far? She was ashamed of her pettiness, her tiny joy when Seven kept showing up drunk and unhappy. _“Good,”_ she had thought. Sitting in the guest room now, looking at the gaunt, pale figure before her, Janeway was deeply ashamed of herself. She was a person who had a code of honor. A deep moral center that instinctively guided her behavior. And she had discarded it all because she’d wanted Seven and Seven had not wanted her. So, yes, she had been bitter and vindictive. Now, she was nauseous. This was the great Captain Kathryn Janeway? The peacemaker? The diplomat? The scientist? Petty, vindictive and gleeful at the hardships Seven had not been able to weather. Who was she? How could she have done this?

Her mother returned with a cup of hot coffee, “I put whiskey in it. I figured you could use it.”

“Thank you, Mom. But I’m going to need a lot more than whiskey if I’m going to fix this mess. 

“Does Cara know?”

“No. I need to call her. Let her know.”

“She won’t be happy about it.”

“I wouldn’t be either, if the shoe was on the other foot. But, we don’t lie to each other, we don’t hold things back from each other.  We’ll weather this like we have everything else.”

Gretchen had been relieved when Kathryn had started dating Cara. Although she knew her daughter had loved Seven, she did not know she would pursue another female when she finally decided to start dating again. Gretchen didn’t care one way or the other. She only wished for someone to love her daughter completely, give her a safe place to be while she faced all her demons.

Kathryn contacted Cara that night to let her know what was going on. Cara arrived at the Janeway farm the next morning. She was well aware of how Kathryn felt about Seven of Nine, ‘ _the one that got away.’_ And she had no intention of letting the woman she loved be alone with the wounded sex goddess of her dreams.   

They’d fought that morning in the kitchen. Gretchen had been feeding the horses in the barn when she stepped onto the porch and came to a dead halt.

“Do you want to fuck her?”

“Please don’t talk like that in my mother’s house.” Kathryn had hissed.

“Well, do you?” 

“I won’t dignify that question with an answer. That’s not even how my mind works, Cara. And, I don’t care what you say, she _is_  my responsibility.”

“I would think her husband would be the one for that.”

“He doesn’t know her the way she needs to be known.” 

“And you do?”

“I severed her from the collective, and I have been her single guide towards her humanity. She wasn’t ready to be out in the world when we landed here. And it ruined her. I ruined her.”

”You’re attracted to her… still.”

“She meant a great deal to me!”

“' _Love of your life’_ I believe those were your words.”

“And it wasn’t reciprocated. She married someone else. She’s never indicated any interest in me in particular or women in general. So, we’re all safe. Everything’s good.”

Gretchen stepped inside.

TO BE CONTINUED...


	2. PART 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Janeway discoverers what lead to Seven's break down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this has taken a while, but I want to get this story right. I have appreciated everyone reading and commenting, even though they didn't have any idea where this was going. I do have a plan but, trying to execute it is difficult. Many thanks to my beta reader, Agnes. She's been invaluable.

HUMANITY  
Part 2

Gretchen stepped inside, stomping her boots to alert the two women, then fussed around in the living room for five minutes to let them recompose themselves. Finally, she casually strode into the kitchen.

“Good morning, Cara,” the elder Janeway greeted the Betazoid.

Cara embraced her, “Gretchen, you’re looking well.”

Gretchen pointed to Kathryn, “This one keeps me on my toes. Always has, always will. Can I get you some coffee? Tea?”

“Tea would be lovely, thanks.”

AS Gretchen moved to the stove to grab the kettle, there was a loud, violent crash from the guest room.

Kathryn sprinted up the stairs two at a time. As she reached the top, she saw Seven of Nine kick her bedroom door open, her eyes wild.

“The collective is coming, Captain! We must secure the premises!” She charged down the hall, opening doors and scanning the rooms. Finally, she turned and looked at Kathryn, Gretchen and Cara at the top of the stairs. Her face twisted into confusion. “Where am I? Where have you taken me? I cannot stay here the Borg know my location!”

“Seven…” Kathryn’s soothing tone grabbed the ex-Borg’s attention. “You’ve been very ill. I brought you to my family farm to help you recover.”

“I am ill. Yes. I am Borg. It is an illness. Move away or I will assimilate you!”

“You can’t assimilate anyone, Seven, you’re severely depleted of nanoprobes.”

“NO!! They are coming! How will I protect myself?!” She charged at the women. Janeway, acting on instinct, grabbed the tall blonde by the wrist and pulled her rapidly forward, yanking her off of her feet. Seven landed with a thud.

Furious, Seven kicked Janeway’s feet out from under her, sending the older woman tumbling down on top of her. Taking advantage of Seven being pinned by Kathryn, Cara leapt in and injected the flailing figure with a hypospray. Seven looked utterly devastated, “Please, Captain, do not put me off the ship! I am sorry for anything I have done to displease you! I will be better! I will! Don’t let the Borg take me!” As she lost consciousness, the Admiral gripped her tightly in her arms, beating back tears. “Oh god, Seven. I would never do that. Never. How can she believe that?”

“Because she’s detoxing and she’s out of her mind,” Cara said as she bent to check Seven’s pulse. “You can’t do this here, Kate. She needs to go to a hospital or a detox facility—”

“No! I abandoned her once, I won’t do that again!”

“Kathryn, stop,” Gretchen warned. “Cara is only helping. Let’s get Seven back in bed.”

********

Later, after Gretchen went to bed, an exhausted Kathryn joined Cara on the porch. The redhead leaned into her partner, resting her head on her shoulder. Cara’s arm wound its way around her shoulders and pulled her close.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” Janeway husked.

“I accept your apology, but, you have to know this is a bad idea. People die from detoxing.”

“I know. I know. She just breaks my heart. ”

“I know. I could feel it,” Cara’s voice broke. “And I could also feel her fear… not fear… hopelessness. Something has made her give up. I don’t know what. But it’s deep and it’s…” Cara searched for the right word. “She’s broken. Something broke her. To the core of her soul. That’s all I can sense. I’d have to have her in sessions to get at the root of it.”

“I can’t put her in a facility, Cara. They’ll strap her to a bed and leave her to her nightmares.”

Cara sighed, “Then you’ll have to get proper medical care for her here. We can’t just keep sedating her without hydrating her and giving her nourishment. She’s already so thin, she can’t afford to lose any more weight.”

Janeway looked up at her partner of a year, tears in her eyes, “So you will help?”

“I don’t know. I don’t like any of this. I’m having some pretty lousy feelings myself.”

Kathryn tilted her head up, her elegant fingers reached up and stroked Cara’s jaw, coaxing her down for a deep kiss, then pulled back, “I’m here. I’m with you. I’m not leaving.”

Cara’s own tears made an appearance as she kissed Kathryn passionately, wrapping her arms around her slender waist, and pulling her onto her lap.

********

“You should have called me sooner,” The EMH spat. “She cannot detox without proper care!”

“I’m sorry, Doctor, I just needed to get her out of that horrible place.”

The doctor scanned the unconscious form in the Janeway guest room. “She’s dehydrated, her electrolytes are so low they’re barely registering. She has some recently repaired broken ribs and internal bruising.” The doctor turned to the Admiral and raised his eyebrow.

“Bar fights,” Janeway informed him.

“Ah. Well, we need to get fluids and nutrition into her as soon as possible.” He quickly injected Seven with electrolytes. Then scanned the room.

“Can we use modern medical equipment in this room?”

“I’m afraid not, Doctor,” Gretchen spoke up. “This is a traditionalist community, we don’t have enough electricity to power anything beyond 21st century basics.”

“Do you have replicators?”

“No.”

The doctor nodded, “Well, we’ll have to rely on 21st century methods then.”

The doctor tapped his commbadge, “The Doctor to Ensign Laraby.”

The doctor’s young assistant answered: “Laraby here, Doctor.”

“I need you to…” He stopped and turned to Gretchen, “Do you have a transporter pad here?”

“Normally, no, but, when Kathryn stayed here for a few months she installed one in the barn so she could commute to Starfleet.” When he looked at her, quizzically, Gretchen explained, “it has its own power source.”

“Excellent. We’ll need to find a way to use that power source for a portable regeneration unit. I know Seven has not relied on it as much over the years, but right now, she desperately needs to replenish the nanoprobes so they can work more effectively to help her recovery.”

“I’ll get B’Elanna out here,” Kathryn said.

The doctor turned back to his assistant, “Ensign, I need a number of 21st century medical aids transported to the Janeway farm. I’ll need IV bags of saline, IV bags of a liquid nutritional solution, the ingredients for which I will provide later, an IV pole, and a 21st century intravenous needle, stainless steel, 18 gauge. You should be able to easily replicate these. That’s just for now, I’ll send a longer list later.”

“Yes, sir. I’m on it.”

The EMH signed off then turned to the three women, “I discovered something in my scans that I’m unsure of. I must return to my labs and do further research to confirm.”

“What are you talking about? What is it?” Janeway demanded.

“I’m not sure, Admiral. That’s why I need to confirm some things before I say for certain. I will set up the equipment when it arrives, then you three will need to do all the nursing. Unlike a modern hospital or starship sickbay, the IV bag and nutritional intravenous solution will need to be monitored and changed as they deplete.”

Kathryn tenderly stroked Seven’s arm, “We can do that, Doctor, thank you.”

********

The days passed with the three women taking shifts. They’d still heard nothing from the doctor. Kathryn sat in the chair, struggling to stay awake. Cara had taken the night shift to let Janeway sleep, but she’d not been successful.

“Captain?”

Janeway at Seven’s bedside in a nanosecond, “Yes, Seven, I’m here.”

“Where am I?”

“You’re at my family farm, Seven.”

“How did I get here?”

“I brought you here from Trebus.”

“Why?”

“You’re detoxing, Seven. From the palanqua.”

“I require hydration and nutrition.”

“Are you saying you’re hungry and thirsty?”

Seven nodded, “I am starving, Captain.”

Gretchen and Cara were in the kitchen eating breakfast when Kathryn entered, “She’s awake and she’s hungry and thirsty.”

The two women let out a small yelp of triumph. “Maybe you can get some sleep now, Kathryn?” Her mother scolded.

“We’ll see. She’s not out of the woods yet.”

Cara groaned, “Kate, we talked about this. You do no one any good when you deplete your own resources.”

“It’s not like I don’t want to sleep, Cara! You think I haven’t tried? It just doesn’t happen.”

“Fine, do what you want.” Cara stood and angrily strode out of the house.

“I don’t understand you, Kathryn. You call Cara out here to help you with Seven, and then you treat her like this.”

“I’m sorry, mom. I’m just overwhelmed.”

“We all are. Shape up.”

“I’m trying—”

“Stop trying and just do it, Kathryn. This is not an attractive look on you.”

“I’m sorry. I’ll do better.”

“Now, I made oatmeal this morning. You can take some up for Seven.”

*******

Seven was propped up by pillows, struggling to feed herself. “I am so weak, Captain.”

“Seven, we just had a knock down drag out, I think that means we should be on a first name basis.”

“Kathryn, please help me.”

Janeway took the bowl, scooped oatmeal onto the spoon and tenderly fed her beautiful ex-Borg.

Seven eagerly swallowed it, “More…”

Neither of them noticed Cara near the doorway, watching as Kathryn gently fed Seven, stroked her face, kissed her forehead.

Hours later Kathryn came downstairs to discover Cara sitting on the couch, her packed duffle bag next to her.

“Cara, what’s going on?”

“I’m leaving.”

“Of course, you need a break. Take a week –”

“God, Kate, you’re so dense. I’m not coming back. I’m done. I can’t do this. I can’t watch you fall in love with her all over again.”

“Cara, I have no intention of pursuing a relationship with Seven. Look at her! What kind of asshole do you think I am?”

“You’re not an asshole. By any measure. Except to yourself. You waited 4 years in the Delta Quadrant, and lost her. Now, you’ll do the same because of me. I don’t want to be your obligation like Voyager was."

“You’re not an obligation! I love you, Cara.”

“To a degree, yes, Kate. But, imagine how painful it is to see a look in your eyes that I’ve never seen before… and it’s for Seven.”

“Please don’t leave this way, Cara. We can work this out.”

“That wouldn’t be good for me. This is a blessing, Kate. I would have lived my whole life with you and never known that I was only getting a part of what you can give. I don’t want to be saddled with that life.”

Cara stepped off the porch and crossed in the darkness to her waiting shuttle.

********

The next few weeks were a rollercoaster. At moments, Seven was lucid, able to eat and drink, at others, she imagined innumerable demons: The Borg were coming for her, all the victims of her assimilations were sitting around her bed, and, when B’Elanna Torres showed up to install the portable regeneration unit, Species 8472 had shapeshifted into her form. To her horror, the Admiral had to grab her phaser and stun the Borg to prevent her from killing B’Elanna.

Janeway had fully expected her former engineer to be furious, and to leave the “ungrateful ice bitch” to her own problems. She was surprised by the tears she saw.

“This is heartbreaking.” The half-Klingon whispered. Gretchen prepared tea and caramel brownies to help soothe B’Elanna’s nerves. They ate in the kitchen while B’Elanna tried to wrap her head around what had happened to the once brilliant and fearless Seven of Nine. “I don’t understand how Chakotay could let this happen and not tell anyone. How he could just disappear? She was so terrified she wouldn’t fit in.”

Chakotay was the true mystery in all this. Despite the Admiral’s best efforts, he had still not been located.

“I don’t understand it either, B’Elanna, it’s not like him.”

“He’s dead to me.” She sneered, tears forming again. “I don’t know if I can forgive him for leaving Seven like this.”

Kathryn rubbed her temples and sighed, “I’m not sure what to feel. I’m furious, but I’m also worried. He could be dead, B’Elanna.”

“If he isn’t, I’ll take care of that when I see him.”

They finished their tea and got to work running power from the transporter pad to the house and connecting the portable regenerator. They worked well into the night, which B’Elanna shouldn’t have done in her condition. “I’m just pregnant, Admiral. I was pregnant under worse conditions in the Delta Quadrant.” The engineer believed getting Seven to regenerate would be the best way to get her back on track to recovery so she insisted on completing it that day.

The half-klingon’s theory had proven correct. Within hours of her first regeneration, the old familiar Seven of Nine began to appear. Her nanoprobes were replenishing and working again, repairing whatever damage the palanqua had done to Seven’s mind and body.

Over the next few days, Seven dis so well Janeway felt she could leave for a few days to catch up on Starfleet business. She called Seven nightly, checking in on her. She noted that, as Seven had sobered up and gotten through detox, she’d become more alive, more aware and more invested in her future.

Gretchen put her to work a couple hours a day pitchforking hay in the loft. Kathryn was appalled, “Mom, she’s not free labor!”

“Kathryn? Really? Is that what you think I’m doing? I’m wearing her out so she can sleep at night, and so she’s too exhausted to stay in her head. Being outside in the fresh air and working up a sweat are incredibly therapeutic.”

“You’re right, mom. It does seem to be working, she looks better every day.”

“Old school problem solving works sometimes, Kathryn.” She grinned at her daughter on the comm screen and won a half smirk back.

“Noted, Commander Gretchen.”

********

The day Kathryn returned to the Janeway farm, she could see Seven working away in the barn.

“That looks like hard work.”

Seven twisted, suddenly fearful, in a defensive stance.

Kathryn held her hands up, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snuck up on you like that.”

“Kathryn!” Seven dropped her pitch fork and lunged into a fierce embrace with her former Captain. “I thought you would not return after I ruined everything.”

“You haven’t ruined anything, Seven.”

“I behaved terribly and I damaged your relationship. I have not only ruined my own life, but now I have ruined yours as well.”

“You had nothing to do with that. That’s squarely on my shoulders.”

“I am sorry that you are sad.”

“Of course, I’m sad. I cared for Cara a great deal. It’s only natural to grieve when a relationship ends.”

“I understand.”

“Mom says you’re practically recovered.”

“I believe I am. There are many things I will need to do to get my life back on track.”

“I’ll help however I can, Seven.”

The next two days Seven and Janeway worked around the farm, ate well, and spending quiet evenings with Gretchen, who cooked “the most delicious things” Seven had ever eaten.

Seven seemed to be thriving. She’d made contact with the Theoretical Propulsion Group, discovering they were eager to have her. Kathryn helped her prepare for a short trip and a one-day tour of the facility, fiercely hugging her on the transporter pad in the barn. “I will only be gone one day, Admiral.”

“Of course, Seven. See you tomorrow.”

The next day, the doctor arrived early, without warning, while Seven was away.

“I have discovered proof of something I suspected during my scans of Seven.”

“What is it, Doctor?”

“Seven showed signs of having given birth.”

“What?”

“Judging by the scans, she went full term and gave birth."

“I never saw a baby at Chakotay’s sister’s house. Seven has never mentioned she had a baby.”

“Well, she did.”

Gretchen gasped, “Of course. Now I know why that look in the hallway chilled me.”

“What do you mean, mom?”

“My sister once lost a baby. She had that same look.”

“Why would she never tell anyone?”

The doctor sighed, “I called Chakotay’s sister to confirm. About a year ago, Seven gave birth to a boy. She and Chakotay were over the moon. But about three weeks after he was born, his nanoprobes began to treat his human system as an invading body. There was nothing they could do on Trebus. They didn’t have the medical facilities. He died in her arms at two months of age. Sekaya informed me that’s when both Chakotay and Seven began to drink heavily. Chakotay left on a ‘spirit walk’ and never returned.”

Kathryn heard her mother gasp, “He left a grieving mother alone with strangers… It’s unforgivable.”

The Admiral worked overtime to hold back her tears. How could Chakotay have done this? He had watched Seven fall apart and left her with nothing and no one.

*********

Seven arrived back from her tour elated, “Kathryn, Gretchen, I believe I will enjoy my new position at the Theoretical Propulsion lab. They have asked me to lead a team in working on a slipstream drive similar to the Borg.”

They celebrated with a homecooked meal and lively talk around the dinner table. Gretchen headed to bed and the Admiral and the ex-Borg stayed up late helping her make plans to begin her new job. As the evening wore on, Seven noticed that her former Captain seemed to grow quiet.

“You seem preoccupied, Kathryn, what is wrong?”

“I don’t know how to say this, Seven. The doctor discovered something during your scans.”

“What did he discover?”

Kathryn rubbed her forehead, “That you had a baby.”

Seven stiffened, “I do not wish to speak of this.”

“Seven, you have to. You can’t carry that pain inside you.”

“I understand. I will seek counselling when I am settled in my new position. But I cannot speak of this. It is too painful.”

Janeway wanted to push, but the anguish on Seven’s face stopped her, “You promise you’ll get help?”

“Yes, Kathryn.”

“Good. I have to go to Starfleet for a few hours tomorrow, ’Ill be back in the afternoon and we can get you prepared for your new job.”

********

The house was quiet that night when Kathryn returned. She hadn’t expected to stay at Starfleet so long, but she’d found a few more threads she needed to tie up before she could leave. She started up the stairs and saw the light on in the guest room. _Good, Seven was up_. She’d at least be able to say goodnight and check on how she was coping.

She knocked gently and waited, but there was no answer, “Seven? It’s Kathryn…” Still no answer. Concern etching her face, she opened the door to find the bed undisturbed and Seven gone. She quickly turned and headed towards her mother’s room, shaking the sleeping form in her bed.

“Mom, where’s Seven?”

Gretchen sleepily replied, “In bed.”

“No, she’s not. Her bed is made and she’s nowhere to be found.”

Gretchen sat up, “Shit, Kathryn.”

“Shit what?”

“She was having a lot of trouble today.”

“Where could she be? Where would she go?”

Gretchen gasped, “Oh god. We walked to the pond today. She kept asking how deep it was.”

Kathryn was down the stairs and out the front door like a shot. As she sprinted through the field, the corn stalks whipping her face, she tried to push away the image of a dead Seven face down in her pond.

As she approached, she realized she’d forgotten to bring a light source, it was a new moon and there was almost no starlight. She ran to the edge of the dock and peered into blackness, “SEVEN!” She dove in. She was searching blind, her hands reaching out and waving wildly in front of her. She stayed down as long as she could, then swam to the surface, gulped air in, then immediately dove back down. She was flailing in the darkness, kicking her feet to push her deeper into the water’s inky depths. Sheer horror beat at her mind. Again, she swam to the surface for air and saw her mother at the end of the dock swinging a lantern. It illuminated the entire pond. Kathryn swam in a circle, surveying the surface, maybe Seven had floated to the top. Then, she remembered that Seven would not float. Gretchen was now in the water, holding the lantern with one hand, swimming in circles to illuminate as much of the pond as she could.

That’s when Kathryn saw it, a glint, below the surface. “Mom! Here!” She dove towards it, still unable to see clearly in the murky water. She reached her hand out in the direction of the glinting metal and felt Seven’s Borg hand floating freely. She grabbed it, pulling herself to the inert body lying below the surface. She grabbed Seven under her arms and kicked as hard as she could to bring them both to the surface. They barely moved. Janeway’s lungs felt like they would explode from the lack of air and the sheer effort, but she refused to let go of Seven. Her kicking grew weaker, her lungs began to collapse, desperately needing air. Just as she was blacking out, she felt a firm hand grab her tunic and haul her onto the shore. Gretchen immediately turned Seven on her side and pounded her back, water poured out over the frail ex-Borg’s pale blue lips. Kathryn began CPR, while Gretchen gave mouth to mouth. Goddamn traditionalist colony! A medical tricorder would have cleared Seven’s lungs and had her breathing in seconds. Kathryn was at least grateful for her Starfleet training in 20th century lifesaving techniques.

Suddenly, Seven violently coughed up water. The Admiral and her mother turned her on her side. Seven opened her eyes and let out a keening wail: “Why did you not let me die!!”  
  
Kathryn held her, rocking her in her arms, covering her with tender kisses, weeping, “Because, I need you to live, Seven.”

TO BE CONTINUED...


	3. HUMANITY PART 3

Just prior to our return to the Alpha Quadrant, I had been struggling with a number of things: my feelings for Chakotay seemed muted, I was unsettled by the distance the Captain had been putting between us since learning of my relationship with Chakotay and I wished to be more connected emotionally for a number of reasons, least of which was that I was unhappy and lonely. Perhaps, if I could feel that sacred thing that the Captain spoke of, “an emotional connection to humans” I would feel more human.

That is why, just before we unexpectedly returned to the Alpha Quadrant, I approached the Doctor and had my cortical inhibitor removed.

I was not impressed with my feelings. They were sharp and random. They sprang out of nowhere from nothing. I had expected to finally feel more of a connection to Chakotay, but that did not happen. Instead, I discovered that my feelings remained the same. I thought I could not feel love because of the inhibitor, imagine my anguish upon the removal of the inhibitor to discover that I did not love Chakotay.

I did not change the parameters of our relationship after this discovery. There were three reasons for this: 1: I assumed I was unable to love. 2: We were suddenly back in the Alpha Quadrant and I was afraid of what awaited me. 3: He was the only crewmember of Voyager who seemed willing to remain in contact with me.

I had expected joy, happiness, connection, friendship. But, instead, I became painfully aware of how lonely and isolated I was. I was deeply unhappy. With a regulator on my feelings, I could remain blissfully unaware of the ache caused by my isolation and people’s disdain for me.

With my cortical inhibitor removed, all of these painful realizations plagued me day and night.

I had made a terrible mistake. Instead of joy and friendship I found bitterness at the way Janeway had abandoned me, resentment at my situation, anger at Chakotay for isolating me even further on his home planet, Trebus. And I had acquired no skills for navigating these emotions. Hence, my denouncement of Janeway at the debriefings. She had hurt me, deeply. I wished to reciprocate.

I left Earth and never looked back. I would live on Trebus and shut out the sources of my pain.

Chakotay’s sister Sekaya was kind and welcoming. She instructed me in the ways of Chakotay’s people. I enjoyed her company and her history.

Then, I got pregnant. Chakotay was ecstatic. I was surprised. I was not aware that my reproductive organs could even work. I wished to leave Trebus and return to Earth where the Doctor could ensure a safe pregnancy to full term. Chakotay did not wish to go. They had midwives, he told me. Women had been giving birth like this for many millennia.

Finally, I began to experience positive emotions. I cared for my unborn child. I spoke to him often.  I told him about everyone on Voyager.  I expressed my fears and hopes for him. As he grew in my womb, so did my attachment.

As the midwife laid him against my naked chest, I felt his little lips eagerly clasp onto a breast and felt him suckle his nourishment out. I felt such love, a sense of completeness. He was everything. Here was my humanity at last.

Sekaya was the first to notice that he did not seem to be getting enough nourishment. We went to the local clinic, a small building near the capital city. It was there that they discovered that his body had determined my nanoprobes were an invading force. His tiny form was destroying itself in its efforts to make it healthy.

I begged Chakotay to let me go to the Doctor. But he had become bitter about Janeway and Voyager.  He believed we would be able to manage his condition with the immune-suppressant drugs the clinic gave us. This would hopefully prevent his white blood cells from continuing to attack his nanoprobes.

He died three weeks later in my arms, as I sang to him. I did not know such agony could exist. Such a deep, slicing pain that never ended. I howled that day and many days after. I was furious with Chakotay. “You killed my infant!”

He began to drink. He seemed quite pleased with this solution, so I decided drinking would also aid me.

Over the months, he would disappear and be gone for weeks. I went to Earth to antagonize Starfleet members in local bars. I liked the pain of being hit. I liked the feeling of my fists connecting with something hard. But, most of all, I loved getting rescued by the Captain.

It was during these “rescues” that I felt the most connected to any human. To my Captain. It did not matter that she was angry and disgusted with me, I wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. This is why I kept showing up to the same bar, starting the same fight. I needed to see Janeway and I knew she would not see me any other way.

The last time she came for me, I could see that she was finished with me. I could not accept that. I could not lose my thin connection to her. So, I invited myself to spend the night. I did not know that she had a lover. Someone she cared for, staying with her. I laid in the guest bed and listened to them making love and knew that I was a failure. As a human and as a Borg. I was neither now. I would go back to Trebus and never return. I would find a way to end my life. People killed monsters, did they not? I was a monster.

<><><><><><>

Seven awoke to find the Admiral’s ex-lover going over her charts. When she spoke, her voice cracked from disuse, “My attempt at ending my life was unsuccessful.”

 Cara looked up and smiled, “You’re awake. No, Kathryn found you and pulled you out of the pond.”

 Seven turned her head away, tears welling in her eyes. “I require hydration.”

 “I’m guessing that means water?”  Seven nodded. Cara replicated a glass of water and crossed to the ex-Borg. “We need to sit you up so you can drink.” Cara leaned down as Seven bent forward, putting her arms around the too thin frame.

 “Arms around my neck.” She coaxed.

Seven reached up and wrapped her arms around the brunette who easily lifted Seven and moved her into a seated position. As she pulled away, Seven held on. Trapped, Cara swiveled her head to see a look of anguish in the young woman’s eyes.

“What you’re feeling is completely natural.”

 “I do not want to feel it!” She cried out.

“Nobody does. It’s a horrible feeling.”  Seven nodded. “Would you like to drink some water? Can you do that?” Seven nodded and Cara handed her the glass. Instead of taking it, Seven’s shaking hands grasped onto Cara’s and guided the glass to her lips. She gulped the water down, “Whoa, whoa, slow down, you haven’t had anything in your stomach for three days.”

“I have been here for that long?”

“That midnight swim did a number on your systems. Human and Borg.”

“Where is Captain Janeway? I must speak with her. 

<><><><><><>

When she entered the room, Seven was sitting in a chair by the window in her hospital gown.

 “Hello, Seven”

 “I must go to Trebus.”

 “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea.”

 “I must go, and you will take me.”

 “That’s not going to happen, Seven.”

 “Do not tell me what will and won’t happen. You have made too many errors in your predictions of what will and won’t happen to me.”

“You’re not well, Seven.”

“How does one get well from being the cause of their infant son’s death? Do you have a remedy?”

“No.”

“Does your ex-lover have a remedy?”

“Time and therapy.”

“Has she had much success with this strategy for other mothers who killed their children?”

“You didn’t kill Arun, Seven. It was a horrific thing, but you couldn’t have known what would happen to your son.”

“I knew. But Chakotay would not listen. I must go to Trebus to retrieve Arun because he is…” Her voice broke, “…he is alone, Captain. He is alone.” Tears streamed down her face. Janeway crossed to the  blonde, crouched in front of her and pulled her into her arms. “I’m so sorry.  I’m so sorry.” Seven choked on sobs as she continued, “His father is gone, his mother is gone. There is no one on Trebus who will remember him, no one who will tell his stories. Of how he taught me to smile. To feel joy. How he was my humanity. I need him here. With me.” Janeway wiped at Seven’s tears with her thumb, her own eyes welling up, “I’m sorry, Seven. I know you’re angry with me, but this is the best place for you to be right now.” Seven twisted away, “Leave.” Kathryn tried to reach out to pull her back, but Seven stood up, her back to her.

“Leave. You are not welcome here.”

The Admiral felt leaden as she rose, “Seven, please, listen to me—”

“No!” The Borg shouted. She opened the door to the hall, “Orderly! Orderly!!”

Janeway raised her hands in surrender and quickly slipped out the door. Once in the hallway, she doubled over in agony.

<><><><><><>

Cara entered  the small hospital conference room holding a thick binder, “Hey, Kate, how are you holding up?” Kathryn gave her a wan smile. Cara reached across the table, “You look exhausted,” she said.

“I’m okay. I… I’m lost. I don’t know what to do.”

Cara nodded, “I’ve spoken with Seven at length, but it’s very hard to get her to open up.” 

“Any insights?

“Well, severe childhood trauma, being in a “coma” for 18 years… and… then she had her cortical inhibitor removed.” 

“Cortical inhibitor? I know nothing about this.” 

“The Borg install a failsafe mechanism in the emotion center of the brain, if any feelings become too intense, the inhibitor shuts the Borg down.”

“What do you mean, shuts them down?”

“It’s like a hard reset. Her functions are momentarily halted as she reboots. And that causes her to pass out. On Voyager, early in her relationship with Commander Chakotay, she had it removed by the EMH.”

“Why did I not know this?”

“She didn’t want you to know. She had a great deal of shame around her need to explore human intimacy. She didn’t understand her feelings and she didn’t understand her lack of feelings. It was terrifying before she had the inhibitor removed but, after, she was coping with thousands of new feelings, most of them negative. Fear, loneliness, heartache, guilt. Then, the one time she begins to experience positive emotions, with her new baby, he dies because of her nanoprobes. She drank to numb the feelings. When she sobered up, she developed a very human coping strategy, denial. She pushed her grief inside. When you mentioned the baby, it all come flooding back. She believes she is not human, she thinks she cannot love or be loved, and, the one time she felt she might experience a human connection, her own nanoprobes killed the source of that love. She says she’s defective and must be deactivated. She asked me to do it for her… several times.”

Kathryn’s face twisted into grief. “It’s my fault. She needed me and I failed her.”

Cara stroked her arm along Kathryn’s back, knowing it wasn’t the time to disagree.

“What do I do? Is there anything? Is she just broken forever?”

“One thing you could do, Kate, is enter therapy yourself.”

“Stop it. You always do that. Push therapy on me. I don’t need it.”

“Why don’t you need it?” 

“I’m an Admiral in Starfleet, Cara. I set an example. If I can’t handle the shit that happened in the Delta Quadrant, what does that say to my crew?”

“It says that they’re not alone.”

“Do you know something I don’t?”  Cara looked away. Janeway pressed further, “Are you treating Voyager crewmembers?”

“You know I can’t divulge that. But I can tell you that Voyager had an unusually high percentage of crewmembers with PTSD. It’s four times higher than the average.” 

“Four times?” Janeway dropped her head into her hands. “When does it end, Cara? When do they just get to live their lives?” 

“When their Captain shows them how.”

This earned a furious look from the Admiral. ”And how do I do that? Be selfish? Think only of myself? Walk away from Seven… again?

“No. But please, Kate. When someone has faced the horrors you’ve faced there is no way they escape sane. I know you think it’s a weakness to admit you’re hurting but, I’m sorry, no matter how much you think you can avoid it, at some point, you’re going to have to face your demons.”

“I don’t have ‘demons’ I have nightmares.”

“Nightmares that make you drink to excess? That make you stay awake night after night? I was there, Kate. I saw it all.” She reached out to grasp Janeway’s hands in her own. “Look at me, babe.” The endearment brought Janeway’s head up. “I love you. And because of that I need you to have a life, even if it’s not with me. I need you to heal. Because I know this is not what you want for yourself. Please, consider counseling...”

Kathryn pulled her hands back into her own lap. “How long will Seven be here?”

“I don’t know. Right now, it’s indefinite.”

“Indefinite? That can’t happen, Cara. She can’t be cooped up inside four walls indefinitely.”

Cara took a deep breath, “It’s out of my hands. This comes from the top.”

“The head of your department?”

“Starfleet.”

The hairs on Janeway’s arms prickled, “I don’t like the sound of that. Did they state a reason?”

“They’re concerned about Seven.”

“Concerned how?” She growled.

“They believe that if Seven has a severe mental breakdown, she could revert to her Borg self and become a danger.”

“I see. So, she’s a prisoner then, not a patient.”

“She is a patient. She’s my patient.”

“Who’s being held while Starfleet Brass figures out what to do with her.”

“I would never let them interfere with her treatment, Once she’s well, I will demand she be released.”

Kathryn shook her head, letting out a grim chuckle, “You have no idea what you’ve gotten into. None. You can’t trust them. Did you know they wanted to dismantle her? It took everything I had to prevent that. If Owen Paris hadn’t backed me up, I’d be in a Federation prison and Seven would be dead.”

“I would never let that happen.”

“How? Who are you?" Janeway spat. "Do you have some high-level clout I don’t know about? Because I was a goddamn returning hero and they wouldn’t listen to me. What’s to prevent them from coming here and talking her by force?”

“Me. So far they are not actively interfering. She’ll be fine, Kate. I will take care of her.”

The Admiral smiled, “Of course, Cara. I’m sorry. I know you’ll do your best.”

<><><><><><>

An hour later, Janeway entered Seven’s room and tossed her a replicated biosuit. “Get dressed. We’re leaving.” Seven wasted no time asking questions, quickly slipping into the outfit. Janeway stood at the door, peering out into the hallway. “The transporter room is six meters away, down this hall, then a right. On my signal.” Janeway nodded and they exited into the hospital corridor. It was eerily empty.

“Where is everyone?”

“I pulled an alarm on the east wing.”

They quickly arrived at the transporter hub. A Starfleet crewmember was standing at the controls, waiting for them.

“What took you so long, Admiral?”

“I had to create a distraction. You have the coordinates?” The Ensign nodded. The Admiral and Seven stepped onto the transporter pads and were gone.

_**TO BE CONTINUED...** _

 

**Author's Note:**

> Now what? Suggestions? Anyone want to be a beta reader to help me shape the rest of this? And by beta reader I mean beat me up, tell me what's trite, what sucks. My contact info is in my profile. Help.


End file.
